Tan Me Hide

Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport

Rolf Harris

[Spoken:]

There's an old Australian stockman lying, dying. He gets himself up onto one elbow and 'e turns to his mates, who are all gathered around and 'e says:

Watch me wallabies feed, mate

Watch me wallabies feed,

They're a dangerous breed, mate

So watch me wallabies feed

Altogether now!

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

Keep me cockatoo cool, Curl,

Keep me cockatoo cool

Ah, don't go acting the fool, Curl

Just keep me cockatoo cool

Altogether now!

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

'n' take me koala back, Jack

Take me koala back

He lives somewhere out on the track, Mac

So take me koala back

Altogether now!

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

And mind me platypus duck, Bill

Mind me platypus duck

Ah, don't let 'im go running amok, Bill

Just mind me platypus duck

Altogether now!

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

Play your didgeridoo, Blue

Play your didgeridoo

Ah, like, keep playin' 'til I shoot thru, Blue

Play your didgeridoo

Altogether now!

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

Tan me hide when I'm dead, Fred

Tan me hide when I'm dead

So we tanned his hide when he died, Clyde

And that's it hangin' on the shed!!

Altogether now!

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

Tie me kangaroo down, sport

Tie me kangaroo down

When I was a kid we had this song on cassette tape.


I loved it because of the crazy lyrics and Aussie accent. The part when the stockman tells his friends to tan his hide when he's dead offered plenty of fodder for the old “Why?” questions that skipped about my head constantly.


The song came up in conversation at a house party I recently attended. I was more than slightly out of sorts due to exhaustion and was barely coherent when the group I was with began talking to a young man about the goat skin drum he was messing around with. I mentioned this awesome song and wondered aloud how a human skin drum would sound.


Everyone was appropriately horrified by the thought.


I continued, though and offered up a little bit of current science talk about manufacturing sheets of skin for grafting onto burn victims. However, such sheets are often quite thin and have large holes in them because of the process involved in removing the skin donation followed by stretching. In order to get a sizable amount that is thick enough to be tanned, one would have to insert something under the skin to stretch it out over a long period of time and then harvest when a large enough patch could be taken. You can tan someone's hide while they are still alive and well!


However, there might not be enough to make a drum.


You might have to settle for a wallet.


Wouldn't that be weird? To carry a wallet made of your own skin?


This is yet another example of why I need to sleep more often.


Plus, not sleeping gives me migraines.


Like today.


On my first day at a new job.


Luckily, I didn't mention making a wallet out of my own tanned hide.


So far.

. . .

Go here to learn more about the song: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tie_Me_Kangaroo_Down,_Sport