Everyday

Everyday it's a-gettin' closer
Goin' faster than a roller coaster
Love like yours will surely come my way
A-hey, a-hey-hey
Everyday it's a-gettin' faster
Everyone said, go ahead and her
A-hey, a-hey-hey
Everyday seems a little longer
Every way love's a little stronger
Come what may
Do you ever long for, true love from me
Everyday it's a-gettin' closer
Goin' faster than a roller coaster
Love like yours will surely come my way
A-hey, a-hey-hey

Everyday seems a little longer
Every way love's a little stronger
Come what may
Do you ever long for, true love from me
Everyday it's a-gettin' closer
Goin' faster than a roller coaster
Love like yours will surely come my way
A-hey, a-hey-hey
Love like yours will surely come my way

Santa Monica Pier, May 2011

I've been thinking a lot about falling in love lately. Maybe it's just the season. You know. Fall is for falling in love, right? And I adore everything about Fall, so why not love too?

The problem is: I can't seem to visualize myself in the type of situation where such a fall is probable or possible.

I'm totally content with my life as it is. I have a great job, amazing luck in my housing situation, an incredible, growing family, and dreams the size of the Pacific Ocean -- what more can a girl ask of the world? Why should anyone want more than a situation that is already so unbelievably wonderful?

It honestly feels selfish to wish for anything else.

But as soon as I begin to relax, complacently is knocked over when someone reminds me of my lack. (Which starts a small cycle of guilt for being displeased at all with my life.)

Recently a regular lunch conversation turned to the topic of dating -- as things usually do between young single people. The question of choosing someone to date was brought up and has led to more questions in my churning brain: How can you know in a short period of time whether someone will be a good match? Does it matter where you meet, what they wear, or initial conversation topics? Do high heels denote a lack of depth in character? What is a "spark" and how does one delineate between coarse friction and the perfect recipe for such an intense, desirable flash of light? What are good limits to campaign for and which are ones to keep more on the fence about?

I am very Mormon. I attend church regularly, give a steady tithe of 10% of my income, I don't drink or do drugs, and I live in a conservative manner. I go to the temple as often as I am inclined -- which has been with some frequency since I moved about eight blocks from the Salt Lake temple.

Recently the question has arisen of whether or not I ought to date someone who is not a member of the LDS church. It's not as easy a question as I thought. My sisters both dated outside the church. They both married the men they dated. One brother-in-law joined the church as a result of the relationship and one did not. The one who did join the church did so simply because he believed in it -- not because of the relationship. Our family introduced him to the church and the missionaries simply as a effort to educate him in our culture and show him a little of what my sister had grown up with.

So, what about me?

I thought about it really hard this year. And realized something quite important about myself: my religious beliefs are more than just Sunday observances; they explain the deepest parts of my character, expectations, and influence all of my decisions. Including the decision of whom to date. I realized that if I were to date someone who did not share my beliefs it would be inevitable heart break. Unless he was the kind of person who would is naturally inclined to accept the principles of the LDS church anyway -- in which case he would want to join the church, right?

I don't know. It's not as cut and dry as I always thought. The one thing I do know and hold to with all I have: I will marry inside a temple and promise for this life as well as for eternity. That is my sincere desire and and is very firmly pressed into my heart.

Manti Temple

As far as dating is concerned, I've sort of adopted the principle illustrated by the saying, "A watched pot never boils." Meaning, if I think too much about it or look too hard things will never get steamy. This often leads to being oblivious of opportunities to act and expedite the process (turn up the heat -- hubbah, hubbah!).  But along the same line of thought, it's always been my belief that romances ought to proceed gradually -- becoming warmer incrementally until suddenly at a rolling boil.

Ok. Enough of the water analogies. This is going to make me pee. Plus, it's just getting bad.

I guess the main point of this post goes back to something a plasma donor told me. He said that I deserve to be with a nice man. While my initial reaction to that statement is to deny and assert my independent ability to take care of my own happiness completely, I think the wisdom of his words have sort of sunk in. When applied to others I can certainly, and very generously, wish all the happiness in the world to dear friends -- which includes finding the perfect match and helpmate.

Maybe it's the right time for me. Maybe it's not. I don't know. All I know is that I've been thinking a lot about falling in love. And every day it seems to be getting closer.

After all, I did get this fortune in my fortune cookie earlier this week:

Picture and directions found here.

Passionate new romance appears in your life when you least expect it.

Hubbah, hubbah!