A few weeks ago I was talking to a friend and the subject of dating came up, as it inevitably will in a party of single Mormons of marriageable age. My friend complained that he couldn't ask girls on dates because he didn't have the money to provide a good time. I countered that with the offer to make a list of free and cheap dates tailored for the Tooele Valley area.
And that's what I did.
Before we launch into my very long list of activities, let me just go over a few tips in date etiquette borne from personal experience.
1.) Ask for a date in person.
Whether it be face-to-face or via phone call where you actually speak to your intended date, give them the courtesy of personal contact. A casual invitation to see a movie or go out to eat through Facebook or text message is fine if it is intended to be casual get-together for friends. But, if you have any amorous intentions, be clear and ask for a date.
It is ok to use the word "date" while asking for one.
Trust me.
2.) Plan simple dates.
It seems as though marathon dating has become the acceptable format for all dates these days. My little brother recently went to a high school dance after an all day date. They went to see a movie, then on to dinner, dropped everyone off at home to change for the dance, picked everyone up again, attended the dance, went out for dessert, and made it home before midnight.
All they really needed to do was go to the dance together.
Imagine that: asking someone to a dance and then just dancing together and going home.
Huh.
Crazy.
It's ok to plan dates to last one hour or less.
One activity.
One hour.
The entire point of asking someone out is to find out whether or not you two are compatible as a pair and would enjoy another date some other time. There is no need to squeeze five dates into what is meant to be the first.
If, however, the first activity is a success or more time is desired to get to know one another, it is more than acceptable to propose another venue or activity. Just make sure that your date is comfortable with extending the date.
3.) Plan ahead and be specific.
There is something very unattractive about a date who shows up on time but has not given much thought to the actual date itself.
On the other hand, thoughtfully planned activities that incorporate your similar interests and highlight ways in which you might be compatible are very attractive.
Date Ideas
The following is a list of girl-approved dating ideas for groups or pairs. While some are Tooele-specific, most others can be accomplished anywhere.
I apologize for the rough formatting. I simply don't want to go through it all again to make the list look purty. It's just going to have to suffice as is.
Enjoy!
Laptop movie date in the park
Play on the park equipment
picnic
spaghetti dinner – prepare and enjoy together
picture scavenger hunt in downtown Tooele
star gazing
hiking
sunrise hike
sunset hike
Go to DI and find the “best” outfit, try them on, take pictures, put it all back on the racks
DI scavenger hunt
picnic on the floor indoors
coloring book contest
carve watermelons/pumpkins/squash – whatever is in season
make a pinata and break into it
service scavenger hunt
go visit at the nursing home
Blast music from your car and go dancing in a parking lot
Antelope island adventure
Bake a cake – eat it
Give someone a heart attack – cut out paper hearts and tape them to a person's door
pick random ingredients from your cupboards and make something delicious
Go to the library, read children's books, act out the children's books
Make taffy
Hide and seek in the library
Attend a fireside together
Attend a CES fireside together
Attend an institute or YSA activity together
Go to the institute building and shoot some pool
Build a snowman/snow critter
Take pictures out at Blackrock, Saltair, and the abandoned train car
Do random acts of service
Leave nice notes in random places for passersby to find
Test drive a car
Applebees karyoke with the 2 for $20 deal
Go to a high school play, concert, or sporting event
Play hide and seek at the cemetery
Find the oldest headstone at the cemetery
Host a concert in your backyard for a local band – get friends to come with dates
Bowling and laser tag
Build a blanket fort and tell scary stories – make oven s'mores
Make your own adventure with magazine pictures and photo copies of your face – find a sweet magazine picture and past your face into it so that you are snow boarding in the Alps or walking the red carpet with other celebrities.
Find a friend with a projector – have an outdoor movie night with the cheap boxes of candy from Wal-Mart
Go on a can drive for the food bank just by yourselves. Make sure to donate the cans collected instead of eating all of the string beans yourselves.
Buy an assortment of candies and rearrange the names of the candy to say different things – throw your names into the mix.
Donate plasma together, then use the money to have a real date.
Disney sing-along with your favorite Disney movie
Go caroling out of season.
Make macaroni pictures
Finger paint with pudding
Make cornstarch gloop and play with it
Tie dye
Declare a backwards date where you say your goodbyes first and “recap” all of the things you did, then do everything you said, only backwards.
Go to IKEA and pretend that you live in the different rooms they have set up. Eat cheapo meatballs.
Make milkshakes and eat them.
Go to Cafe Rio and just order two medium drinks. Make crazy combinations with all of the syrups and drinks they have out. Share some flan.
Attend Erda Days – enjoy an Erda burger and some BINGO.
You Tube loop. Look up a video on You Tube and then only watch videos that pop up in the suggestion list to the side.
Play old school video games – whatever you have in your house.
Slurpees at 7-Eleven
Organize a flash mob in Wal-Mart. Convene afterward for a treat someplace.
Progressive dinner.
Volunteer at the animal shelter.
Go for a walk.
Geocaching
Cow tipping
Make a movie and post it on YouTube
Search for Big Foot. He's rumored to live in these parts.
Get an enormous ice cream cone from Dairy Delight.
Find the best deal at the Dollar Store.
Make sock puppets and put on a little show. Post it on YouTube.
Eat a meal with several other couples. Sit in a circle and tie everyone's hands together so in order to eat, you have to work with the person sitting next to you.
Eat a meal with no hands, just your face. Bring plenty of trash bags to wear and wet wipes to clean up with afterward.
Play couples tag.
UNO
Phase 10
Spoons
Spazz
Play the question game. You can only speak in questions. Whoever makes the first statement that isn't a question looses. This is a very good way to get to know how evasive someone can be.
Make a sand castle in the nasty sand out by the Salt Lake.
Film something awesome to put on You Tube
Complement each employee working at Macey's. Enjoy a frozen yogurt.
Go to the Clark Planetarium and mess around on the stuff they have open to the public.
Watch all of the Mormon Messages – make your own.
Take turns pretending to be blind. Go for a walk and describe what you see to one another.
And that's what I did.
Before we launch into my very long list of activities, let me just go over a few tips in date etiquette borne from personal experience.
1.) Ask for a date in person.
Whether it be face-to-face or via phone call where you actually speak to your intended date, give them the courtesy of personal contact. A casual invitation to see a movie or go out to eat through Facebook or text message is fine if it is intended to be casual get-together for friends. But, if you have any amorous intentions, be clear and ask for a date.
It is ok to use the word "date" while asking for one.
Trust me.
2.) Plan simple dates.
It seems as though marathon dating has become the acceptable format for all dates these days. My little brother recently went to a high school dance after an all day date. They went to see a movie, then on to dinner, dropped everyone off at home to change for the dance, picked everyone up again, attended the dance, went out for dessert, and made it home before midnight.
All they really needed to do was go to the dance together.
Imagine that: asking someone to a dance and then just dancing together and going home.
Huh.
Crazy.
It's ok to plan dates to last one hour or less.
One activity.
One hour.
The entire point of asking someone out is to find out whether or not you two are compatible as a pair and would enjoy another date some other time. There is no need to squeeze five dates into what is meant to be the first.
If, however, the first activity is a success or more time is desired to get to know one another, it is more than acceptable to propose another venue or activity. Just make sure that your date is comfortable with extending the date.
3.) Plan ahead and be specific.
There is something very unattractive about a date who shows up on time but has not given much thought to the actual date itself.
On the other hand, thoughtfully planned activities that incorporate your similar interests and highlight ways in which you might be compatible are very attractive.
Date Ideas
The following is a list of girl-approved dating ideas for groups or pairs. While some are Tooele-specific, most others can be accomplished anywhere.
I apologize for the rough formatting. I simply don't want to go through it all again to make the list look purty. It's just going to have to suffice as is.
Enjoy!
Laptop movie date in the park
Play on the park equipment
picnic
spaghetti dinner – prepare and enjoy together
picture scavenger hunt in downtown Tooele
star gazing
hiking
sunrise hike
sunset hike
Go to DI and find the “best” outfit, try them on, take pictures, put it all back on the racks
DI scavenger hunt
picnic on the floor indoors
coloring book contest
carve watermelons/pumpkins/squash – whatever is in season
make a pinata and break into it
service scavenger hunt
go visit at the nursing home
Blast music from your car and go dancing in a parking lot
Antelope island adventure
Bake a cake – eat it
Give someone a heart attack – cut out paper hearts and tape them to a person's door
pick random ingredients from your cupboards and make something delicious
Go to the library, read children's books, act out the children's books
Make taffy
Hide and seek in the library
Attend a fireside together
Attend a CES fireside together
Attend an institute or YSA activity together
Go to the institute building and shoot some pool
Build a snowman/snow critter
Take pictures out at Blackrock, Saltair, and the abandoned train car
Do random acts of service
Leave nice notes in random places for passersby to find
Test drive a car
Applebees karyoke with the 2 for $20 deal
Go to a high school play, concert, or sporting event
Play hide and seek at the cemetery
Find the oldest headstone at the cemetery
Host a concert in your backyard for a local band – get friends to come with dates
Bowling and laser tag
Build a blanket fort and tell scary stories – make oven s'mores
Make your own adventure with magazine pictures and photo copies of your face – find a sweet magazine picture and past your face into it so that you are snow boarding in the Alps or walking the red carpet with other celebrities.
Find a friend with a projector – have an outdoor movie night with the cheap boxes of candy from Wal-Mart
Go on a can drive for the food bank just by yourselves. Make sure to donate the cans collected instead of eating all of the string beans yourselves.
Buy an assortment of candies and rearrange the names of the candy to say different things – throw your names into the mix.
Donate plasma together, then use the money to have a real date.
Disney sing-along with your favorite Disney movie
Go caroling out of season.
Make macaroni pictures
Finger paint with pudding
Make cornstarch gloop and play with it
Tie dye
Declare a backwards date where you say your goodbyes first and “recap” all of the things you did, then do everything you said, only backwards.
Go to IKEA and pretend that you live in the different rooms they have set up. Eat cheapo meatballs.
Make milkshakes and eat them.
Go to Cafe Rio and just order two medium drinks. Make crazy combinations with all of the syrups and drinks they have out. Share some flan.
Attend Erda Days – enjoy an Erda burger and some BINGO.
You Tube loop. Look up a video on You Tube and then only watch videos that pop up in the suggestion list to the side.
Play old school video games – whatever you have in your house.
Slurpees at 7-Eleven
Organize a flash mob in Wal-Mart. Convene afterward for a treat someplace.
Progressive dinner.
Volunteer at the animal shelter.
Go for a walk.
Geocaching
Cow tipping
Make a movie and post it on YouTube
Search for Big Foot. He's rumored to live in these parts.
Get an enormous ice cream cone from Dairy Delight.
Find the best deal at the Dollar Store.
Make sock puppets and put on a little show. Post it on YouTube.
Eat a meal with several other couples. Sit in a circle and tie everyone's hands together so in order to eat, you have to work with the person sitting next to you.
Eat a meal with no hands, just your face. Bring plenty of trash bags to wear and wet wipes to clean up with afterward.
Play couples tag.
UNO
Phase 10
Spoons
Spazz
Play the question game. You can only speak in questions. Whoever makes the first statement that isn't a question looses. This is a very good way to get to know how evasive someone can be.
Make a sand castle in the nasty sand out by the Salt Lake.
Film something awesome to put on You Tube
Complement each employee working at Macey's. Enjoy a frozen yogurt.
Go to the Clark Planetarium and mess around on the stuff they have open to the public.
Watch all of the Mormon Messages – make your own.
Take turns pretending to be blind. Go for a walk and describe what you see to one another.
Amazing ideas Zarah. I can't wait to try these one day with someone.
ReplyDeleteI might even use these with Ryan
ReplyDeleteI always prefered the simple dates that consisted of parking at a scenic overlook and snuggling with someone that I liked. It seems you kids are too chicken to actually get physically close so someone. Holding hands or a simple kiss (heavens forbid) does not betrothe you to someone!
ReplyDeleteWell said, Dad!
ReplyDeleteI especially like playing tag at the graveyard or donating plasma together, haha!
ReplyDeleteYour should publish this. It is amazing for any young person, or for that matter older people who are just getting back into the dating scene.
ReplyDeleteI will share this links to my cousin for sure it will guide him to have a date. Thank you so much for those idea so informative.
ReplyDeleteisey