Poetry and musings of a zany Mormon girl who is very proud of her Erda roots.

Monday, December 6, 2010

Tan Me Hide



Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport
Rolf Harris

[Spoken:]
There's an old Australian stockman lying, dying. He gets himself up onto one elbow and 'e turns to his mates, who are all gathered around and 'e says:

Watch me wallabies feed, mate
Watch me wallabies feed,
They're a dangerous breed, mate
So watch me wallabies feed
Altogether now!

Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down

Keep me cockatoo cool, Curl,
Keep me cockatoo cool
Ah, don't go acting the fool, Curl
Just keep me cockatoo cool
Altogether now!

Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down

'n' take me koala back, Jack
Take me koala back
He lives somewhere out on the track, Mac
So take me koala back
Altogether now!

Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down

Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down

And mind me platypus duck, Bill
Mind me platypus duck
Ah, don't let 'im go running amok, Bill
Just mind me platypus duck
Altogether now!

Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down

Play your didgeridoo, Blue
Play your didgeridoo
Ah, like, keep playin' 'til I shoot thru, Blue
Play your didgeridoo
Altogether now!

Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down

Tan me hide when I'm dead, Fred
Tan me hide when I'm dead
So we tanned his hide when he died, Clyde
And that's it hangin' on the shed!!
Altogether now!

Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down



When I was a kid we had this song on cassette tape.


I loved it because of the crazy lyrics and Aussie accent. The part when the stockman tells his friends to tan his hide when he's dead offered plenty of fodder for the old “Why?” questions that skipped about my head constantly.


The song came up in conversation at a house party I recently attended. I was more than slightly out of sorts due to exhaustion and was barely coherent when the group I was with began talking to a young man about the goat skin drum he was messing around with. I mentioned this awesome song and wondered aloud how a human skin drum would sound.


Everyone was appropriately horrified by the thought.


I continued, though and offered up a little bit of current science talk about manufacturing sheets of skin for grafting onto burn victims. However, such sheets are often quite thin and have large holes in them because of the process involved in removing the skin donation followed by stretching. In order to get a sizable amount that is thick enough to be tanned, one would have to insert something under the skin to stretch it out over a long period of time and then harvest when a large enough patch could be taken. You can tan someone's hide while they are still alive and well!


However, there might not be enough to make a drum.


You might have to settle for a wallet.


Wouldn't that be weird? To carry a wallet made of your own skin?


This is yet another example of why I need to sleep more often.


Plus, not sleeping gives me migraines.


Like today.


On my first day at a new job.


Luckily, I didn't mention making a wallet out of my own tanned hide.


So far.

. . .
Go here to learn more about the song: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tie_Me_Kangaroo_Down,_Sport

5 comments:

  1. See you are using the original racist version of the lyrics. Hmm.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hang on just a second...
    You are saying you like a song about a racist Australian slave owner that wants to be made into leather products when he dies.
    Hmm. Hmm.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I took the verse out of the written lyrics.

    ReplyDelete
  4. OK.
    What about the video?
    Also, my point in the second comment still stands.
    >:(

    ReplyDelete
  5. 1.) I don't know how to take the video down without deleting this whole post.
    2.) I'm not a big fan of racism -- it makes me into an angry she-hulk.
    3.) I've always seen the song as a harmless children's song about some crazy stuff. Apparently I have been wrong about it for years.

    Many apologies to anyone who is offended by this post.

    ReplyDelete